Wednesday, June 9, 2010

Sharing some pretty wild homeschooling secrets

Sharing some pretty wild homeschooling secrets

Sharing some pretty wild homeschooling secrets

Posted: 08 Jun 2010 07:41 PM PDT

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Sometime, when I wasn't paying attention, "Jersey Shore" slipped down one place to become only the second most embarrassing-to-all-of-humanity thing on television.

Replacing it at the top? "Pretty Wild," a show you've either never heard of or have already been scarred by. This E! reality show just wrapped its first season following the crazy misadventures of modeling sisters Tess Taylor, Alexis Neiers and Gabby Neiers, who aren't really all sisters, which will make you feel better about the vaguely incestuous poses they strike in most of their shoots ... or worse, depending on your point of view.

You might recognize Alexis' name. In the first episode of the series, appropriately titled "The Arrest," her sisters wait for her outside the precinct after she was picked up on burglary charges, for breaking into Orlando Bloom's house as a member of the Hollywood "bling ring."

Yes. She's that chick.

The reality show started filming right before the arrest, which led to the nine-episode series becoming a strange mash-up of "Keeping Up With the Kardashians" and "Law & Order: Criminal Intent." Each week, the producers (I'm assuming) would tell former Playboy model mom Andrea Arlington to tell the girls to do something Hiltonish, like go get jobs to learn some kind of work ethic. And then the kids would do so, interspersed with phone calls to Alexis' lawyer about how the case is going. And then some vaguely incestuous modeling. Roll credits.

Hey, this is America. Any press is good press, no? And there are a hundred shows just like it on the air. How is this show any worse?

I can tell you. It's the secret.

Literally, "The Secret." I've written about "The Secret" before, so let's go into the files to dredge up some old wounds...

"The Secret," for those of you not up on the latest pop pap, is a new spin on the power of positive thinking. Its story -- so directly borrowed from "The Da Vinci Code" that I first thought the secret was about how to escape copyright lawsuits -- is about a secret power known only to a select few throughout history, a power that has helped a chosen few become leaders, thinkers and inventors. People like Edison. Einstein. Lincoln. Beethoven. Emerson. (Yeah, Emerson. Hey, I like Ralph as much as the next transcendentalist, but he doesn't usually make lists like this. Good for him.)

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